In the machine and the smart age, we have begun to act like our smart devices, machines, and even like retail capital stores. The center of the universe is now me. If something doesn't change to my will, then I don't have to deal with it. Take it back, get a new one, switch companies. We are so used to changed and shaping the world around us that we forget, in essence, who we actually are. We are supreme beings, the rulers of the earth. We have the power to change and shape the world around us. To an almost endless extent, we can cut, mold and form every thought or creation that comes to mind. But in all of this hype of consumerism and power, we might forget that we also are capable of growing and expanding, of increasing our knowledge and even our joy and satisfaction. And our drive for growth or knowledge does not need be monetary gain or entertainment. There is deeper fulfillment in building and maintaining relationships. These cannot just be thrown away, or immediately upgraded. It takes work. It takes honest work, the same work that our aunts and great aunts and their great aunts did to fill the measure of their creation. We were not made to be entertained or simply make and spend money. And because of that, there are some superior points of development now lost to society at large.
One of our greatest capabilities as supreme beings is that of change. We can consciously decide to change. My body, practically unbeknownst to me, has automatically grown for the past 25 years. But our psychology is also constantly changing. We are sponges for information. And in order to grow properly, physically or psychologically, we must fuel our bodies and minds. Our fuel may determine our ultimate path in life -- if I'm obese or toned, if I am illiterate or a stats genius may depend on what I ate, if I went to school, and if I engaged my mind in body in activity and creativity.
So first we must realize our own existence, our own abilities to change, our own needs...and then we will notice our external need for being understood, for interacting, for knowing that someone else cares. Whether extremely introverted or supernally extroverted, an innate human need is to form relationships, to be touched and loved emotionally, physically, spiritually. We must be continually nurtured -- and this does not end when we reach 25. The nature of our nurturing environment, however, will change. But our need for these meaningful relationships is genetically engrained in who we are.
Then why commit? It was hard for me to ever visualize myself as a married woman. It was harder still to visualize being a mother, even though I had the desire to have kids eventually, in some other universe perhaps. Regardless of age or circumstance, we are presented with choices that will allow us to step from one nurturing environment to another, to actualize the visualization of becoming a mother or a father, a husband or a wife. There is no such thing as perfection or perfect cohesion in a relationship -- but there is a capability of perfect progression and learning together. Commitment, a promise, a shared ideal, will get you there. Constant communication about dreams, hopes...and change...will fulfill you in ways that you've never dreamed or experienced. But you've got to try it to know that I'm not just a fluffy princess lover and sociopath.
I cannot discount the importance of spirituality, of prayer, of really getting to know yourself, your gifts, your needs in this process. No one will be perfectly catered to who you "think" you are. But I promise there will be one person perfectly catered to who you can become. Commitment for some may be easy. For me, there were and are hurdles to overcome because for 25 years I felt that "independence" was my destiny. Independence was my essence, and I didn't need any man to help me be better. But I finally realized that I am not complete. I don't want to be alone. I love having a better half. I love learning and growing and having a deeper communication than words can express. I love sharing a new world with just one other human being. A world that we, ourselves, only us, have created. And we've promised to uphold those ideals. We've promised to re-glue, re-upholster when things get old, stained, or in disrepair. We've also promised to never throw away or "return" each other. We've promised to stop looking at the outside world and everyone else's shiny gadgets and comparing them to our own. It's us. We're working, we're happy, and we're complete.
I am far from looking like Belle or Jasmine, and I certainly do not have the same bond as Snow White with the woodland creatures. But I am capable of forming lasting relationships. I am capable of growing, of learning, of creating with someone, just as they were. And what's even cooler, is that I exist. What's even cooler is that my "other half" is not a machine and cannot easily be taken back to the store -- with or without receipt. No matter what his or my problem, I have made a promise to fix it. I have made a promise to allow myself to be fixed. And I've never been so happy in my all of my imperfection and interdependence.
